PART FIVE: STRATEGY

We cannot avoid this topic any longer. I really should have started off the lecture with this point.

Why?

Why Earth?

Why this one little backwater planet?

Why do you keep trying to conquer this place?

Unless you tell me, everything we’ve discussed in meaningless.

Before any battle there is a strategy. A strategy has a goal. There is something that you want to achieve here. What that goal is determines your strategy. It determines what kind of a force you bring. It determines whether you bring any force at all because, as mentioned, some goals are best achieved without military means. But I can’t tell you the best strategy unless I know what the goal is.

(Silence.)

I know what some of you did during your invasions. I what some of you have done in the past. I know that some people have visited the Earth for a reason and did not invade.

(Silence.)

I’m not letting it go this time. If you don’t tell, we’ll just go through each possible motive one at a time until we find it.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Regardless of your goals, if you are vulnerable or deathly allergic to anything commonly found on Earth – like water, bad pop music, or chipmunks – YOU SHOULD STAY THE HELL AWAY. And if you need me to tell you that YOU’RE A BUNCH OF IDIOTS. Str’ee Collective, I’m glaring in your direction!